Am I My Brother's Keeper?

In the Book of Genesis, after Cain killed his brother, Abel, we read,

“And the Lord said unto Cain, Where is Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Genesis 4:9)

I find it interesting that Cain replies that he doesn’t know, and his further response shows that he doesn’t really care either. I have found that sometimes in my own life it is so much easier to stay in my own little bubble and not worry about the world outside. It is easier to get so involved in my own life and crowd out any desire to walk outside see how my neighbors are doing, or call my visiting teachers. I think the natural man is very content with sticking with the comfortable.

Opportunities to serve often come unexpectedly and are oftentimes inconvenient. One of the challenges I have is how to make being aware of others needs, and doing something to help, an automatic response. 

I was driving on the freeway one day and saw a broken down car. As I took my exit I saw a man walking by the side of the road. I thought “I wonder if he needs help”, but was taking my exit and the traffic was getting busy, and I continued driving, and thinking about whether he needed help or not, but didn’t pull over. How simple it would have been to stop and help had I been looking for an opportunity to serve—had my heart been wanting to serve someone else rather than getting done those things I wanted for me.

There is a story from the life of the Savior that really made me think about how He served. In the book of Matthew we read of how Jesus exemplified serving others even when it is inconvenient.

John the Baptist, cousin and good friend of the Savior, has just been killed. Jesus wanted to go somewhere to be alone. He wanted some time to mourn the loss of his cousin so, “he departed thence by ship into a desert place apart: and when the people had heard thereof, they followed him on foot out of the cities” (Matthew 14:13). The people found Him and instead of sending them away He, “went forth, and saw a great multitude, and was moved with compassion toward them” (Matthew 14:14). He then takes the time to focus on others, rather than His own mourning and grief, and heals those there who are sick.

“And when it was evening, his disciples came to him, saying, This is a desert place, and the time is now past; send the multitude away, that they may go into the villages, and buy themselves victuals” (Matthew 14:15).

With evening drawing near, and His disciples requesting him to send the multitude away, how easy it would have been to send away the people. “But Jesus said unto them, They need not depart; give ye them to eat” (Matthew 14:16). He then feeds all 5,000 man (along with their wives, and children) through a miracle. We then read,

“And straightway Jesus constrained his disciples to get into a ship, and to go before him unto the other side, while he sent the multitudes away.

“And when he had sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray: and when the evening was come, he was there alone” (Matthew 14:22-23).

After our perfect Example took care of the needs of others He took time to care for His own sorrow. This teaches me that  when I am mourning or struggling with something if I focus on the needs of others (rather than wallowing in my own sorrow or self-pity) miracles can happen.

In the scriptures we can find many examples of how we should treat others. King Benjamin, in the Book of Mormon, teaches,

“And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God” (Mosiah 2:17).

Wisdom comes when we apply our hearts to understanding (see Mosiah 12:27). My struggle is getting what I know to be part of what I do automatically. I think that King Benjamin is trying to teach us something in these verses about service. If we back up a little we find his opening remarks, 

“[O]pen your ears that ye may hear, and your hearts that ye may understand, and your minds that the mysteries of God may be unfolded to your view” (Mosiah 2:9).

He then teaches us, with examples from his own life, of what we should do (see Mosiah 2:11-15).

1. “[S]erve…with all the might, mind and strength which the Lord hath granted unto [you]”
2. Service should not be done for monetary gain
3. Be merciful, but don’t allow sin or wickedness to prevail—teach the commandments
4. Labor with your own hands to lift the burdens of others
5. Make sure your heart is in the right place, and you are serving for the glory of God and not the honors of men

The Savior taught, “That ye love one another, as I have loved you” (John 15:12). He is our example of perfect love and service. He approached the leper. He did not wrongfully judge the widow and her meager offering of a mite. He was merciful to the woman caught in adultery. He was compassionate to the throngs of people following Him. Sheri Palmer, in a BYU Devotional, expressed it this way,

“What was Jesus doing? He said, ‘I will,’ He ‘touched,’ He ‘arose,’ He ‘turned him about,’ and He ‘was moved with compassion.’ These are characteristics of kindness and love. He was not inconvenienced. It was His way of life. When we act and serve as Jesus did, we become more like Him” (link to talk).

Jesus expressed His love so readily because it was a part of who He was—something that He had to develop through His own practicing. I love the way that Tad R. Callister expresses the process the Savior went through as He became who He was meant to become.

“[T]he great Jehovah, creator of worlds without number, infinite in virtue and power, made his entry into this world in swaddling clothes and a manger.

“Be that as it may, no one could mask his godhood. One might clothe his spirit with flesh and blood, wrap him in mortal garb, draw the veil of forgetfulness across his mind, but no one, absolutely no one, could rob him of his divinely inherited traits. They could not be buried in his mortal frame. They could not be silenced. Every moment of every day his godly attributes were etching themselves on his outer shell. They manifested themselves in every smile, every glance, every spoken word. Godliness exuded itself in every though, every action, and every deed” (Tad R. Callister, The Infinite Atonement, p64).

The same can be true for us. Even though we have been born of mortal parents, we still have an eternal Heavenly Father—the literal Father of our spirits. Etching our divinely inherited traits onto our physical body may be difficult, but depending on the decisions we make in this life our countenance will be our witness as to whether our choices were for, or against, our Heavenly Father's plan (see 2 Nephi 13:9).

I found an interesting story in the Book of Mormon about serving even when things are difficult. From Nephi 's account we learn that Lehi and his family have joined with the family of Ishmael and, by following the Liahona, are headed into the wilderness.

“And after we had traveled for the space of many days, we did pitch our tents for the space of a time, that we might again rest ourselves and obtain food for our families” (1 Nephi 16:17).

While the men are going to obtain food Nephi’s bow breaks—they have no food to bring back to their families. They return tired, worn out, and hungry. There were some in the group that began “to murmur exceedingly, because of their sufferings and afflictions in the wilderness” (1 Nephi 16:20). I find it very telling about the character of Nephi that even though “I, Nephi, having been afflicted with my brethren because of the loss of my bow” (1 Nephi 16:21) he did not complain. Even though he is afflicted just as much as they are (or more so because of their anger against him) he decides to act.

“And it came to pass that I, Nephi, did make out of wood a bow, and out of a straight stick, an arrow; wherefore, I did arm myself with a bow and an arrow, with a sling and with stones. And I said unto my father: Whither shall I go to obtain food?” (1 Nephi 16:23).

Lehi, and his family, humble themselves and turn to the Lord because of Nephi. At this time they learned that the Liahona “did work according to the faith and diligence and heed which we did give unto [it]” (1 Nephi 16:29). Elder David A. Bednar said,

“The description…of the Liahona…specifically was included in the record as a type and a shadow for our day and as an essential lesson about what we should do to enjoy the blessings of the Holy Ghost” (David A. Bednar, Increase In Learning, pg63 - not sure how to reference the page numbers on an iBook)

Nephi served his family even though his situation was just as dire. Through his faith, diligence, and heed to the promptings of the Holy Ghost he was able to bless his family—insomuch that they were provided with food. Similarly, as we serve others—despite our own trials and circumstances—we can be blessed with the companionship of the Holy Ghost. President Thomas S. Monson taught,

“My brothers and sisters, the Lord’s purposes are often accomplished as we pay heed to the guidance of the Spirit. I believe that the more we act upon the inspiration and impressions which come to us, the more the Lord will entrust to us His errands” (link to talk).

And along with the companionship of the Holy Ghost, we can earn the trust of the Lord.

As we listen to the Holy Ghost we can work toward perfection (although we never will attain it in this life). In the story of the rich young man, he professed to keep all the commandments and came to the Savior wanting to know what else was required of him. We read,

“The young man saith unto him, All these things have I kept from my youth up: what lack I yet?

“Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me.

“But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions” (Matthew 19:20-22).

If we set our hearts on the things of this world, instead of on the things of God, one day we may also walk away sorrowing.  Along those same lines, if we are dutifully carrying our lamps, but neglecting to bring oil with us, one day we will be left on the outside of the closed door (see Matthew 25:1-10). Elder Bruce R. McConkie taught,

“We are the Lord’s people, his saints, those to whom he has given much and from whom he expects much in return….We have covenanted in the waters of baptism to love and serve him, to keep his commandments, and to put first in our lives the things of his kingdom” (link to talk).

I remember hearing a story about a teacher who had been teaching about the Life of Christ for a semester. As he taught he explained the need to truly incorporate the teachings of the Master in their lives. 

When students showed up for the final exam there was a sign indicating that the exam location had been moved to a building on the other side of campus. As the students raced across campus there were many people along the way. Among those were a girl who was distressed, someone with a broken down bicycle, and an elderly gentleman who was having a difficult time picking up some books he had dropped. 

As the students showed up to the new location the teacher informed them that they had all failed their final exam. Surprise and shock filled the room. The teacher had explained that throughout the course he had been teaching them about applying those things they had been taught, rather than just mentally knowing them. The distressed people, mentioned above, had been placed there by the teacher to see if these students had internalized the teachings of the Savior.

One of the well-known parables taught by the Savior is known as the Good Samaritan. A man is robbed, beaten, and left for dead. There are those who came but “passed by on the other side” (see Luke 10:31-32).

“But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him,

“And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him” (Luke 10:33-34).

There was much tension between the Jews and the Samaritans during the time of Christ. The Savior was teaching them that they should be loving even those they considered to be their enemies. “For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye?” (Matthew 5:46).

When I focus on my sorrows, challenges, problems, trials, or heartaches, I feel weighed down and less inclined to think of—let alone help—others. When I focus on what I can do for others, and completely forget about what I will get in return, my burdens are somehow lifted. As we turn our lives and problems over to the Lord we can be blessed. 

Elder Carl B. Cook shared an experience that I want to relate here.

“Recently Sister Cook and I attended a women’s conference in South Africa. After we listened to some inspiring messages on applying the Atonement in our lives, the stake Relief Society president invited everyone outside. We were each given a helium balloon. She explained that our balloon represented whatever burden, trial, or hardship was holding us back in our lives. On the count of three, we released our balloons, or our 'burdens.' As we looked up and watched our burdens float away, there was an audible 'Ahhhh.' That simple act of releasing our balloons provided a marvelous reminder of the indescribable joy that comes from looking up and thinking of Christ” (link to talk).

As we look to the Savior we can let go of our own burdens and turn them over to the Lord. By doing what we can to serve others our hearts can be lifted above our own worries and sorrows. We can then gain a greater perspective on what we are really dealing with in our own lives (especially if we can step away from it for a time).

I remember the day I learned that my baby would need to have surgery. Nothing life-threatening, but still serious. As the day of surgery drew near I prayed to find someone else that I could help, someone else that I could focus my energies on—so as not to become consumed with a ‘woe is me’ mentality. 

I found her. She was on the other side of the curtain in our shared hospital room. 

Our babies were in the same room because they had both had the same surgery. I had previously complained about the several weeks that I had a 20 minute drive (twice a week) to the doctor to make sure the pregnancy was going well. She had a 3 hour drive, each way. I had only 1 child needing surgery. This was the second time she had to go through this. I had the support of family, friends, and ward members in the hospital as well as at home. She was alone. My heart yearned to know how to help. I wasn’t sure what I could even do to help her; but the Holy Ghost did. What a great teaching experience for me.

Jon M. Huntsman once taught,

“The Holy Ghost acts within each of us as a moral compass. It tells us what is right and what is wrong. We always know when we are not doing the right thing….The Holy Ghost is there to prompt us, and we never have to reason through those promptings. Acting on them can have a positive and powerful and remarkable impact on our lives....

“[A]bove all else, believe in yourself, and between you and the Lord your dreams can and will come true, and in your pursuit of your dream, never, never forget others. It is a privilege to serve others” (link to talk).

As we remember that we are the literal spirit children of God, we will realize the infinite potential that lies within each and every one of us on this earth. We can do anything that is required of us—with the Lord’s help. 

I was reading the story of the loaves and fishes and something stood out to me this time.

“And when he had taken the five loaves and the two fishes, he looked up to heaven, and blessed, and brake the loaves, and gave them to his disciples to set before them; and the two fishes divided he among them all.

“And they did all eat, and were filled.

“And they took up twelve baskets full of the fragments, and of the fishes” (Mark 6:41-43). 

Sometimes I feel like a very small fish in a very big world. But I have learned that by trusting in the Lord, and obeying Him, I can be transformed from a single, small fish to something much, much greater than I had ever thought possible. 

We are the offspring of God. We have the potential to become like Him. As we look for opportunities to help and serve each other while here on this earth we can become more like Him. As we continually strive to be like Him we can “[receive] his image in [our] countenances” (Alma 5:14), we can be a light to others, and we can discover the purpose for our creation.